Believing in a Hierarchy of Moral Worth

We’ve all learned to believe the myth that there’s a hierarchy of moral worth: that some individuals or groups are more worthy of moral consideration, of being treated with respect, than others.

This belief lies at the foundation of all harms to dignity and all forms and acts of injustice—toward other humans, nonhuman animals, the environment, and even ourselves. It lies at the core of the nonrelational mentality—the mentality that causes us to think, feel, and act in ways that violate integrity, harm dignity, and lead to a sense of disconnection and insecurity.

Perhaps not surprisingly, the belief in a hierarchy of moral worth drives a lot of the infighting in our groups and movements. But this problematic belief and the behaviors that result from it are often not recognized for what they are.

This is because they’re expressed as moral outrage—anger caused by a perceived violation of moral standards—and many otherwise justice-minded and compassionate people believe that feeling moral outrage gives them a free pass to act in ways that are unfair and unkind.

So recognizing the hierarchy of moral worth as the myth that it is and understanding its drivers are some of the most important things we can do if we want to create healthier, more resilient groups and movements and work effectively to create a more just and compassionate world.

Shame and contempt

Shame and contempt are driven by, and drive, the belief in a hierarchy of moral worth.

Shame is the feeling of having less fundamental worth than others and therefore being less worthy than others of being treated with respect. Contempt is the opposite feeling. When we feel shame, we see ourselves as morally inferior; when we feel contempt, we see ourselves as morally superior.

Shame and contempt are two of the most disconnecting and toxic emotions, and they underlie many of the problematic behaviors that drive infighting. And these emotions only exist when we’ve bought into a false narrative—when we believe in the story that some individuals or groups are more worthy of being treated with respect than others.

As such, shame and contempt only exist in comparison. When we compare ourselves with someone we perceive as more worthy than we are (even if that “someone” is simply an idealized version of ourselves), we feel inferior and ashamed. And when we compare ourselves with someone we perceive as less worthy than we are, we feel superior and contemptuous. Shame and contempt are two sides of the nonrelational coin; one cannot exist without the other.

Because most people in the world have bought into the belief that there’s a hierarchy of moral worth, acting it out over and over and over, this belief is deeply entrenched. So even if we come to see that the hierarchy of moral worth is a construction, something that’s been made up, it’s still extremely difficult to stop believing it.

This is not to say that we shouldn’t hold people accountable for their problematic behaviors. Of course we need to do this. But we can hold people accountable in a way that reflects our understanding that the hierarchy of moral worth is a myth, and that honors their dignity.

Moral outrage

Anger is an important emotion that can motivate us to take positive action on our own or others’ behalf. However, when we don’t relate to our anger in a healthy way, it can morph into moral outrage, and we can end up fueling, rather than dousing, the fires of injustice.

The norm within many movements (and in many ways also within the broader culture) is to not only tolerate but to celebrate moral outrage. We rally around those who raise the battle cry of moral righteousness, since we’ve learned to believe that it’s okay to abuse others as long as we’re doing so from a place of moral superiority.

This is one reason why advocates can feel so resistant to the idea that it’s problematic to use outreach strategies that are shaming or otherwise aggressive. Many advocates have learned to believe not only that these approaches are effective (they aren’t) but also that as long as these strategies stem from a place of moral outrage, they’re ethically justifiable. Many people feel fully justified in abusing someone as long as they perceive that person as an abuser themselves.

Author and psychotherapist Terrence Real, who specializes in relational abuses of power, points out that all abusive behaviors reflect a sense of moral righteousness, which includes the belief that people who engage in these behaviors are defending themselves—or, as Real calls it, referencing psychologist Pia Mellody, “offending from the victim position.” A man hitting his wife, for example, almost always says he did so because she did something to hurt him: “She knows I can’t stand it when she complains about the way I treat the kids, but she just couldn’t keep her mouth shut!”

Advocates who berate or otherwise verbally abuse other advocates (and nonadvocates) likewise tend to perceive themselves as acting in defense—in self-defense (if they’ve personally been attacked) or in defense of their cause. However, this kind of behavior is far more likely to harm the cause than support it.

Recognize that the hierarchy of moral worth is a myth

When you feel contempt or shame, recognize the feeling as a red flag alerting you that you’ve bought into the myth that some individuals or groups are more worthy of being treated with respect than others.

You may be thinking to yourself, “But I am inferior to others; I ruined our latest campaign!” Or “I am morally superior—boycotting capitalism is more moral than supporting it!” Or “My outreach method is helping more people than other forms of outreach!” Or “My perspective on trans issues is the more ethical one!”

You may be right that your behaviors are less or more in alignment with the values of justice and compassion than are those of others, or that your outreach method is more effective than that of others. However, the sense of moral inferiority or superiority stems from a belief that you, as a person, have less or more inherent worth than other individuals, that you’re somehow a “worse” or “better” person and are less or more deserving of being treated with respect. This belief is based on factual inaccuracies, and it can be corrected by understanding that each of us is nothing more nor less than the synthesis of the hardwiring we were born with and every experience we’ve ever had. Understanding this reality, and the related issue of compassion privilege, can go a long way toward helping you develop a healthy sense of self-worth and to learn to honor others’ worth.